"We're being watched?" everyone exclaimed simultaneously.
Nami immediately grabbed Luffy's collar and roared furiously, "It's all your fault, you idiot! You just had to come to Skypiea! Now we're being targeted by someone terrifying! Ah, no—we need to leave this place quickly!"
Usopp nodded frantically. "Nami's right! Luffy, let's get out of here, fast!"
"Nani??" Luffy tilted his head and completely ignored the mention of God. "I thought there was a real God. Turns out it's just another Devil Fruit user."
Everyone stared blankly at him. What was going on in this guy's head?
"Hahaha…" Sandy chuckled. "Don't worry, you won't die. If I run into Enel, I'll finish him with one strike. Besides, Luffy's a Rubber Fruit user—he doesn't conduct electricity."
Robin's eyes widened. "You mean lightning doesn't affect Luffy much?"
Sandy nodded. "Exactly. In this world, Luffy is practically Enel's natural counter."
"Hehehe…" Luffy grinned smugly and struck a triumphant pose.
Nami, Usopp, and Chopper immediately started punching and kicking him.
"What are you so smug about, you idiot?!"
"Yeah! You might be fine, but if we get hit by lightning, we'll be toast!"
"It's all your fault, you moron! You were the one insisting on coming to Skypiea! This place is too terrifying!"
Zoro crossed his arms and muttered from the side, "A Rumble-Rumble Fruit user… that's a bit troublesome."
Sandy sighed. "Don't worry. Didn't I just say you won't die? Besides, aren't we here for adventure? If we start running away the moment we hear about a scary opponent, we might as well go home and hide under our blankets."
"What do you mean, 'won't die,' you idiot!"
Suddenly, Nami took a fighting stance—snake fist style—and began beating the already dazed Sandy.
"You idiot! You were the one who said Skypiea exists, right?! And what about the Gold Country? Where's the gold, huh?! I haven't seen a single piece of treasure yet!"
Hey, hey, hey… so you do care about treasure after all!
"Everyone!" Konis stepped forward nervously. "I don't really understand what you're talking about, but Enel is truly powerful. You guys should—"
"Hehehe…" Luffy interrupted with a grin. "What's there to be afraid of? That so-called 'God'? If he dares get in our way, I'll just punch him away!"
Zoro raised an eyebrow. "They said he's a Logia-type user. How exactly are you planning to punch him?"
"Obviously, I'll just punch him directly." Luffy's eyes sparkled with excitement. "Everyone, Konis just said there's an island nearby that absolutely cannot be entered…"
Usopp and Chopper yelled in unison, "Idiot! What are you trying to do?!"
"No, Luffy! We're not going! Skypiea's too terrifying!"
"Hehehehe." Luffy chuckled foolishly. "An island that absolutely can't be entered, huh…"
Sandy sat beside him and raised an eyebrow. "Maybe there are beautiful women, swords, gold, precious ruins, and lots of delicious food there."
Sanji's eyes lit up. "Beautiful women?"
Zoro: "Swords?"
Nami: "Gold?"
Robin: "Precious ruins?"
Luffy looked at Sandy, drool forming at the corner of his mouth. "Delicious food?"
"Alright then! Let's go explore!" everyone shouted together.
Usopp's face was covered in black lines. "Hey, hey, that's enough! They said that place cannot be entered!"
Nami put her hands on her hips. "What are you afraid of? If Enel comes looking for trouble, we'll just leave him to Sandy and Luffy."
"Oh, leave him to us," Sandy and Luffy said simultaneously.
The two, along with Sanji, linked arms and started chanting, "God's Island! God's Island!"
Usopp and Chopper exchanged a look and immediately burst into tears.
To be honest, the Straw Hat Pirates were still a low-tier crew compared to the monsters roaming the New World. If they didn't face real battles now, how could they hope to survive later?
Sandy's reason for encouraging this adventure was exactly that—if they were too scared to take risks, why had they even set sail? They might as well go hide in a cave; it'd be much safer there.
Soon, at the cloud coast, Sandy instructed, "Everyone, some of those four God's Enforcers seem to know Observation Haki. Try not to die."
"Whoa, whoa! Sandy, you have to protect me later!" Chopper clung pitifully to Sandy's leg.
Sandy smiled. "Don't worry, Chopper, I won't let you die. Anyway, looks like we've got company."
"Huh?" Luffy looked around. "Where are they? Where are they?"
A moment later, everyone's faces were covered in black lines.
The group of guards approaching them were crawling on the ground.
Hey, hey—everyone can see you! Do you think we're blind?!
Usopp groaned. "What the hell are they doing?"
Sanji frowned. "These are the people who came to cause us trouble?"
Zoro tilted his head. "Is this… crawling forward?"
Luffy: "A bunch of perverts."
"Oh!" Chopper gasped. "So crawling means being a pervert!"
"Everyone, halt!"
The leader, dressed in guard attire, pointed at them. "It's you! You're the eight illegal intruders reported by the surveillance officer—those from the Blue Sea! You must accept Heaven's judgment!"
"Nani??!" Sandy exclaimed dramatically. "Heaven's judgment? Oh no, I'm so scared! What should we do, everyone?"
He pretended to tremble in fear, wrapping an arm around Nami's waist.
Sanji immediately exploded. "Sandy, you bastard! Let go of Nami right now!"
Nami sighed, patting Sandy's head. "There, there, Mom's here…"
As soon as she said it, her face turned crimson. Did I just say that out loud?!
"Pfft—HAHAHAHAHA!"
The entire Straw Hat crew burst into uncontrollable laughter.
Chopper's eyes sparkled. "Sandy! So Nami is your mom? Sugoi!!"
"Nani??!" Luffy yelled. "Really? Sandy's Nami's son?!"
Sandy looked up at Nami with a pouty, betrayed expression. Nami, face red, snapped back, "I told you, I misspoke!"
Who told Sandy to act so cute just now?!
Meanwhile, the guards stood frozen with black lines across their faces. Was this group seriously ignoring them during such a serious confrontation?!
This was absolutely outrageous!
...
Author's Note:
The fanfic One Piece: My Flirtatious System Adventure is now fully completed.
The entire story has been uploaded on Patreon as a dedicated collection.
📚 Category: One Piece (Chapters 1–657)
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