It has been a few hours
I couldn't sleep for some reason
I just can't stop thinking about it
It hurts. Really bad. Yet, I still think about it
I got up and went to the bathroom inside my room
I closed the door behind me and stared at it
At myself
My face. My body. The way I breathed. The way my eyes looked
"Ahhhhhh!"
I let out a scream from the top of my lungs
"I don't know what to do!"
Warm tears start to roll down my cheek
I sat on the ground. All alone. An empty bathroom with a crying creature that ruins its calmness
"I…I have to go to…Asuka"
"But she wants to kill everyone"
A girl's voice comes from the mirror
"Eh?"
"She wants to kill everyone. Why not just stay here and live like we used to"
"I-I don't know. I don't like it"
"Only after Asuka told you so. She told you how to feel"
"And it's the right thing… Right?"
…
…
The girl is gone
I stared at my hands
I took a deep breath. Tears still on my eyes
I have made up my mind
I got up and opened the door
I started to walk towards the door that lets me out of this room
I gently open the door
A man was waiting for me
The one who caused all of this
Niv
"..Sakura"
"..."
"Please"
"..."
"Don't go"
"…"
"At least don't tell anyone"
He doesn't even look me in the eyes
I walked away and went outside
I felt a burning sensation in my body. It was like I was angry at him for showing more remorse
I headed to Asuka's wooden house
How can she be all alone, and still be okay? Is it because of that comic book?
I knocked on the door
And she opened
"Hey Sakura. Good morning"
"...It's supposed to be night"
"Oh~ Who's getting all of a sudden smarter?"
"..."
"Come on in"
I walked inside, and went to the TV
"Wanna watch something?"
"...No"
"Oh. Then why are you here?"
"I..I wanted to talk"
"You came to bargain? Am I Dormammu?"
"I don't know what are you talking about"
"We have to watch the Infinity saga together"
"...But I want to talk"
"Augh. Okay"
"..Sorry"
"Spit it up"
".....I don't know what to do"
"You mean what you want or what you need to do?"
"Is there a difference?"
"Of course. One is for your satisfaction. The other is for what's right"
"Why can't it be both?"
"That't just how the situation is"
"I… I want to do the least bad thing"
"Then help me"
"But you are going to kill everyone"
"In order to give them a better life"
"Is it… okay?"
"Of course. Haven't you heard of doing something for the greater good?"
"..Yeah.. The old man always talks about it"
"But in this situation it's different. My plan is clear"
".."
"Sigh"
"Thanks. Asuka"
"For what?"
"For caring about me"
"What? I don't care about you"
"Huh? Then why are you doing all of this?"
"Doing what?"
"Letting me watch your movies, and getting me into a plan to save the world"
"I just did that because I felt like it. Also I need you for now"
"..So.. You don't care about me?"
"Not a single bit"
Tears start to fall
"T-That's cruel and rude"
"But I am honest. Am I not?"
"Y-Yeah"
"I won't lie for no reason"
"..Yeah"
I've cried enough
"Asuka"
"Yes"
"Can I stay here?"
"You want to live here?"
"At least for tonight"
"Under one condition"
"What is it?"
"Let's watch the Infinity saga"
"Now?"
"Yes"
***
For the first time from as far as I can remember, I haven't done anything with someone before going to sleep
Asuka is next to me. She's preparing to sleep
"..A-Asuka?"
"What?"
"...Will you do something to me while I am sleeping?"
Without opening her eyes, she says, "Of course not. I am not a creep"
"O-Oh.. Okay"
We were sleeping with a gap between us
"..Asuka"
"What?"
"Can I sleep next to you?"
"Sigh. Come here"
I got closer to her. She was giving me her back
It's the first time I slept with a woman
For some reason I felt this overwhelming feeling. I raised my arm, and…Hugged her from behind
She didn't speak. She didn't move. She just stayed there
I can feel her body getting bigger and smaller with each breath
I can feel and hear her heart beating
I can feel her warmth
For the first time. I was able to feel these things with nothing in return
***
It's the next day
I am still in the same position as I slept
I got up, and it seemed that Asuka was already awake. She just stayed there so I won't wake up
"..What are you reading"
"The Bomb devil arc"
"Oh"
She gets up and looks at me
"Come on. We're taking a bath"
"Huh? Together?"
"Of course not. I don't want to look at a minor's body. What am I? An old man with a sick fetish"
"…"
We headed outside her house, and she picked to buckets of water
"Here" She says as she hands me a bucket. Somehow she was able to hold it with one hand. On the other hand I had to use both of mine
"You go there. I will be here"
"…"
"Sakura"
"..Yes?"
"You take a bath there. I will be the one taking one here"
"…"
"What is it?"
"..Asuka"
"Yes"
"I-I am kind of scared that someone might be watching me"
"You are hopeless aren't you? Okay. I will stick around. Not because I want to look at you okay? It's for protection"
"..T-Thanks"
I started to take my clothes off while Asuka was having a hard time being around
I finished my bath, and I realized it
"Asuka"
"What?" She says as she is looking on the complete other side of me
"I don't have new clothes"
She seems to realize it now
"I-I will give you some of mine"
She gave me the clothes she was supposed to wear
I wore it. It's way bigger than me. The shirt hung down and reached to my thighs
The clothes smell faintly like her
I don't even think the pants will fit me
Asuka heads back without taking a bath, and I follow her
"Sakura"
"..Yes"
"Stay here. I will go and take a bath"
"Okay"
She leaves as I sit on the ground
I decided to pick the book she was reading
It had really weird looking things. They were all in weird poses and covered in blood
But for some reason I felt connected
I started to switch the pages. With each page taking a few minutes to look at
By the time Asuka came back, I almost finished it
"Oh. Putting your hands on some peak?"
"E-Eh? S-Sorry I didn't meant to do it without your permission"
She just smiled and got closer
"Do you know how to read English?"
"What's that?"
"A language"
"What's that"
"A way to communicate, whether it's by listening, writing, reading, or speaking. Humans have the most complex system when it comes to all living things"
"Will you teach it to me?"
"Of course. Sit and look at me"
I did as she said. I hugged my legs and put my head on my knees. My eyes and ears were fully focused
"Penis"
"Pēnisu"
"No No. Penis"
"What's that"
"A fuck rod"
"What is it used for?"
"Only men have it. It's used to have sex"
"…"
"Black anal"
"Black..Naru"
"Black Einal"
"What does it mean?"
"A black asshole"
"Asuka"
"Huh? I am not a black asshole!"
"N-No. I wanted to ask something"
"What is it"
"Why are you teaching me this?"
"I am teaching you English"
"..Yeah, but why this"
"I want you to understand what is happening around you. And the best way to do so is by knowing its name and meaning"
"O-Oh..Sorry"
I feel kind of relieved to know what these things are called
"I am bored. Let's do something else"
"Is it enough for today?"
"More than enough"
"Can I ask questions?"
"Go ahead"
"What are these zombies?"
"They first appeared in Mexico. They spread and were close to the border of the USA. So they nuked them. It made it spread way faster, and now the world is filled with zombies"
"What is Mexico and the USA?"
"Countries"
"Then why is the sun always out for months?"
"Because there is a witch who wants to cause a worldwide famine. She decided to stop the earth from rotating. According to legends. I find it as crap"
"So Earth was going in circles, but because of this witch it stopped?"
"Yes"
"Is it a bad thing?"
"Yes"
"Then why are we alive"
"We are barely alive"
"How come?"
"Because on the other side of the planet, there are people who have superpowers. They are basically kept in locks and prisons, and are forced to use their powers to keep the planet alive"
"How do you know all of this"
"I heard about some. I've read about some"
"Oh"
"Any other questions?"
"...I don't think Niv is my brother"
"Ohh. This is the type of questions I like"
"He has darker skin than me. I don't even know who are my parents"
"First of all, that's racist"
"What is racist?"
"Judging someone by their skin color. It's extremely bad. Bad girl!"
"S-Sorry. I didn't mean it. Please forgive me"
"It's okay. You are learning. Also, Niv's skin color became like this because there is more melanin"
"What's melanin?"
"Something that protects you from the sun"
"Is it why I am more white?"
"Yes, because you barely leave"
"...Yeah. He said the same thing"
"Sakura"
"..Yes"
"We are starting tomorrow"
"Starting what?"
"Phase one to save the world"
"What is it"
She smiles and gets closer to me. I can feel her breath. I can feel her warm face
She stares at my eyes and says, "Killing everyone"