"Get out" I yell at my sister, she understands that am in a foul mood cause she simply replies "don't destroy anything" before leaving the room.
I lock the door behind her before walking over to my window. I had promised Kingsley I wouldn't injure myself ever again but right now my mind is a mess and I have not forgiven my parents yet so I won't give them a reason to reprimand me by vandalizing my room.
I was having a ground splitting headache at this point coupled with the fact that I needed something, somewhere or someone to vent to.
I pulled open my drawer, pushing away a pile of scrap books before retrieving a match box.
I returned to the window letting the wind toss my hair around before taking two pills out of the box.
I plop it into my mouth before chewing down on it. "Ewww" it's bitter as fuck. My family don't know I do drugs; well it's not like am a drug addict or something, I just take it when am very stressed and that time is right now.
Everything became clearer all of a sudden. I could see our neighbors across the street in their living room, I think they were watching TV.
Then in front of our yard was a black cat, it was sitting in the flower patches my sister made.
I was about to shut my window when something caught my eyes...a figure... moving around a blind spot at the far side of the alley.
I had ruled the person out to be a thief...probably trying to lift a car or something...but a wave of nausea hit me as recognition dawned on me. The person lit a cigarette and I saw his face, I remembered seeing him with Henry. Henry had me followed.
"Shit...shit...shit" I cuss as I shut my window. I try to stabilize my breathing but that at this moment is the hardest thing to do; now I wish I didn't take those drugs earlier.
I frantically scrambled through my closet, I hid it very well because I couldn't risk my siblings finding it.
Removing the sheath I held Jakar, oh how I missed it. I stashed it away because I wanted to let go of everything that had to do with my past life but here I am now holding it once again. The handle a very beautiful black wo.od and the blade very shiny and as sharp as ever.
I kissed jakar before slicing my thighs. Seeing the blood flow out eased my anxiety, Kingsley knew everything about me except for the fact that I engage in self harm.
I don't get any happiness from harming myself but it is the only way to ease my mind. The pain that shoots through my body as blood flows out replaces the anxiety and fear. Pain is something I have never been afraid of, it is also the sole reason I was the leader of my pack before Henry happened.
Before Kingsley I had no friend, I only had Jakar, at a point I started to think I might be mentally unstable because I started having conversations with him (jakar).
Even now after so long he is still here to ease my anxiety. I won't hide him in the closet anymore, where ever I go am taking him with me.
Kingsley is a great guy, I know he won't detest me for my weird tendencies but I still can't tell him not to talk of Sean...
I move towards the window again, I stick out my head my eyes wandering to the blind spot again but the motherfucker is no longer there.
I sigh before deciding to leave my room;I needed fresh air,I carefully tucked Jakar underneath my shirt.
I sneak down the stairs, everyone is asleep already and it's just 11pm. Most of the time I sleep past twelve but that's by the way.
I open the front door looking sideways before stepping out; I shut the door so quietly cause I don't want to wake up anyone.
I walk to the front, I stop to turn on my torch because I bumped into something.
Looking down I smiled as I picked up the cat I saw before. "I am sorry for disturbing your sleep" I whisper before squatting to drop it back on the grass.
Still squatting I run my hand through my hair fatigue settling in.
The air tonight is so chilly..."yikes" I shiver watching the cat go back to sleep.
I smelt it then; a faint trail of cigarettes mingling with the smell of flowers in the night air. I instinctively squatted lower before turning off my torch.
Peering through the gate I see the same guy again but this time he was not alone; another guy was sitting around 70meters away from him.
"You guys suck" I sneered "You are spying on someone and can't even blend in" pttf...
I crawl all the way to the back of my house, folding my pants and tying my hair before jumping over the fence. This is not the first time am doing something like this so of course it was noiseless.
Turning around the driveway I crawled forward hiding in the shadows.
I stopped to look and they were still sitting where they were.
I sneaked up on the one closest to me and the fool was asleep..."moron"I cuss before covering his mouth with my freehand and doing Jakar the honor of greeting his throat.
Seeing the blood my adrenaline immediately spiked as I grinned.
I don't bother to sneak up on the second one, I walk straight up to him.
This moron thinks he can beat cause he takes one last puff before picking up his club.
I smirked which to my advantage got him angry cause without calculating he swung at me; dodging him I took a slice of his arm which was now in the open before landing a kick on his knee. He landed with a *bang* face down wincing in pain. In a very quick movement I bring his arms to his back before sliding his club behind them.
Pulling his hair I placed Jakar at his throat enjoying the horror in his eyes when he realized he couldn't move his hands nor his legs which I am now squatting on.
"Why did Henry send you here? I ask all amusement gone.
He struggles to break out of my hold but that only tightened Jakar's claws on his throat...
"We were talking about how we would have loved to fuck you then one of the boys said you a demeaning bitch who thinks she is too good to be fucked by us and he would make sure the next time you guys met he fucked the hell out of you before killing you" he groaned as Jakar dug his way through the surface of his skin.
"Henry told us that if we were able to do so he would upgrade our ranks so both of us decided to break into your house but there was someone watching from the Windows that's why we hesitated to come in" he finally blurted.
I throw my hair back in laughter before responding... "Henry doesn't value you guys cause if he did he wouldn't send you to your deaths" i reluctantly retrieve Jakar before kicking him in the gut.
Watching him writhe in pain I bent down to whisper to him.."I won't finish you off although you might not make it if you don't get treatment immediately, if by any miracle you survive then tell Henry I said that any discussion we had previously this evening has been discarded and that if he feels that he is shit he should come for me directly" I wipe the blood off Jakar on his clothes before pointing towards his mate "Don't forget to clean the trash on your way out".
~
I slide back in looking at the wall clock... 1:05am...; I sneak back up the stairs before quietly slipping into my room.
I took a quick shower. I took out a band-aid and covered the slash on my thigh.
My eyelids became very heavy as I drifted off in sleep.