For the past few days, the air in Axel had been full of cheer.
Kōichi and Kazuma had practically become the Adventurers Guild's walking billboards.
Every morning, the moment they opened their eyes, eager adventurers were already bringing them fresh juice. Even the old lady selling cabbages on the street would slip them two extra.
Wearing brand-new capes bought with their advance bonus, Kōichi and Kazuma spent their days loafing around in the guild's most conspicuous booth, basking in this shaky, impossibly sweet hero life built on a lie.
"Man, Kōichi, days like this, where I can drink the good stuff without even having to hunt Slimes, are basically Heaven." Kazuma sprawled in his chair, lazily swirling a glass of iced juice in one hand, his face full of blissful burnout. "I wish this misunderstanding could last forever."
Kōichi was just about to tell him that this was the power of brains when the guild doors quietly opened.
A beautiful woman in a long purple dress stepped inside. She had a gorgeous figure, but somehow gave off the overwhelming impression of "I'm weak and helpless, please bully me."
It was Wiz.
Her gentle brown eyes swept anxiously across the hall before locking onto Kōichi's table.
"Ah! K-Kōichi-san! Kazuma-san! Thank goodness, you're both here!"
Wiz hurried over. She was moving so fast that her ample chest bounced wildly, drawing more than a few glances from the adventurers nearby.
Kōichi and Kazuma exchanged a look, and both of their hearts sank at the same time.
Wiz had once been one of the Demon King's Generals. She definitely knew what kind of person Beldia was, and she definitely knew there was no way these two idiots could have scared him off with sheer aura alone.
"Shh! Wiz! Keep it down!"
Kōichi shot to his feet, and before anyone else could react, he threw an arm around her shoulders and shoved her into the booth, lowering his voice.
"What are you here for, to wreck our setup? Or to expose us?"
Wiz's face instantly turned bright red from Kōichi's sudden closeness, and she fidgeted with her hands nervously.
"N-no, no! That's not it! I heard about what happened a few days ago... Beldia-sama... no, Beldia really did go back. But I also heard Darkness-san was hit by the Death Curse! That's Beldia's proudest technique. If something isn't done quickly, then in one week Darkness-san really will..."
She was so frantic she was almost in tears. Leaning close to Kōichi's ear, she whispered,
"My current position makes it difficult for me to act directly, but I brought some powerful dispel potions from the shop's private stock. And... if it comes to that, I can try contacting Beldia and see whether he'll lift the curse for my sake. So where is Darkness-san right now? Is she already in so much pain that she can't move?"
Kōichi and Kazuma fell silent.
Then the two of them slowly turned to look at the other side of the booth.
Darkness was stuffing huge pieces of fried pork cutlet into her mouth while glaring with intense disappointment and frustration at Aqua, who was currently playing strip rock-paper-scissors with the adventurers. Naturally, Aqua was the one losing.
"...Wiz, does she look 'in too much pain to move' to you?"
Kōichi pointed at Darkness, who had just grabbed the last rib and was grinning like a conqueror, and asked in a complicated tone.
Wiz froze.
She stared blankly at Darkness, who looked full of life, even more fired up than usual.
"Huh? Huhhh?! How is that possible? That's the Death Curse! Even the highest-level priests shouldn't be able to deal with it without a complicated ritual..."
"Sacred Create Water!!"
Aqua's bright voice rang out from the other end of the hall. Having just lost another round of rock-paper-scissors, she was now spraying water at the adventurers in a fit of embarrassed rage, while also turning the drinks on several nearby tables into pure water.
"...Wiz, that blue-haired idiot may have something seriously wrong with her head, but she's still an absurdly overpowered priest who can wipe away something like the Death Curse as casually as cleaning off a stain." Kazuma pressed a hand to his forehead and sighed. "So the only thing Darkness is suffering from right now is probably the fact that the curse disappeared too fast for her to enjoy the feeling of 'being ravaged by death' any longer."
Wiz just stared, dumbfounded. The poor Lich brain of hers seemed unable to keep up.
"...S-she instantly erased Beldia's curse? Aqua-san... could she really be someone incredible?"
Looking at Wiz's pure, gullible face, Kōichi felt that sadistic little idea rising up in him again.
He gently patted the back of her hand and gave her the most upright, trustworthy smile imaginable.
"Wiz, since you're this worried, how about we talk somewhere quieter? Your shop, maybe? I've actually gotten very interested lately in the internal contact network of the Demon King's Generals. If you could introduce us to Beldia, we might be able to settle this whole problem for good, and maybe... make a little money on the side."
Wiz shrank back a little. For some reason, Kōichi-san's smile felt even scarier than the Demon King's.
"...Kōichi-san, the look in your eyes... why does it feel like you're planning to sell Beldia-sama for cash?"
Like two foxes catching the scent of gold, Kōichi and Kazuma got to either side of the frail, helpless Wiz and quickly spirited her out of the noisy guild under the excuse that heroes needed a private place to recover in secret.
"Heh heh, Wiz, relax. We're just heading to your shop to give you a few pointers on running a business, and maybe discuss some information about Beldia. We're definitely not planning to squeeze you over those absurdly overpriced junk items you keep in stock."
As he spoke, Kōichi wore a warm, friendly smile. At least, it looked warm and friendly to him. To Wiz, it looked incredibly suspicious.
Kazuma nodded furiously beside him, his eyes gleaming with the unmistakable shine of money on the brain.
"Exactly, exactly, Wiz-san. As heroes, it's our duty to help you clear out that overstocked inventory of yours. Like that potion that makes you see your life flash before your eyes when you drink it, or that armor that starts dancing on its own the moment you put it on. We can generously take those off your hands."
Caught between the two of them, Wiz looked like a startled little rabbit. With tears welling in her eyes, she begged for mercy.
"Waaah... Kōichi-san, Kazuma-san, please show mercy! The shop's losses are already so bad I may not even be able to afford bread tomorrow... I'll tell you everything I know about Beldia-sama, so please, please don't carry off my counter again!"
Each of the three had their own ulterior motives, though in Wiz's case it was simply pure fear. As they stepped into the magic item shop, which practically radiated poverty, none of them noticed a blue figure sneaking along the wall nearby, a freshly pilfered bottle of premium red wine dangling from one hand.
"Hmph hmph hmph. Those two, Kōichi and Kazuma, actually thought they could sneak off behind my back to eat something good, or maybe split the loot. But this Goddess's intuition is razor-sharp!"
Aqua muttered to herself as she followed them all the way to Wiz's shop in an absurdly clumsy stealth posture. Which was really just her sticking her butt out and sidling down the street.
The shop door clicked shut.
Kōichi and Kazuma sprawled comfortably onto Wiz's rickety sofa, while Wiz busied herself pouring them that strangely colored welcome tea.
"Alright, Wiz." Kōichi set down his teacup, his expression turning serious, though it looked more like he was trying not to laugh. "Let's talk business. Where does that guy Beldia usually hole up? Besides the Death Curse, does he have any other weaknesses we could cash in on? Like, if someone stole his head, would he pay a huge ransom to get it back?"
Wiz had just opened her mouth to answer.
"Um... Beldia-sama actually..."
Bang!!
The shop door was blasted open with brute force, accompanied by a familiar burst of idiotic holy light and Aqua's lively, infuriating shout.
"Caught you! You two perverts betraying your comrades! Sneaking off behind my back to have a secret rendezvous with this evil Lich! Take this. Turn Undead!!"
"Aaaaahhh!! I'm disappearing! I'm going to disappear!! Kōichi-san, save me!!"
Wiz let out a horrifying scream. Her whole body instantly turned half-transparent, and wisps of white smoke started rising from her.
She flopped wildly on the floor like a salted fish left out to dry, while Aqua stood there brimming with righteous zeal, staff raised and ready to follow up with a second strike.
Kōichi and Kazuma both covered their faces in agony.
"...Kōichi, I take it back." Kazuma stood up through gritted teeth and grabbed a magic item from the counter that looked fairly solid. "This blue-haired idiot isn't some absurdly overpowered priest at all. She's just a walking disaster Heaven sent down to punish our heroic career!!"