"What did you say?! You want someone of my standing to carry this strange little brat covered in dust?!"
A thick vein throbbed at Claire's temple, and she looked furious enough to explode on the spot.
"How dare you treat me like a porter?! You insolent..."
"Claire."
Iris suddenly spoke up in a soft voice, her big eyes sparkling with the pressure known as expectation.
"Megumin ended up like this because of me. Surely you wouldn't refuse to help the person who saved my life, would you? I think Kōichi-sama's suggestion is full of warmth between companions."
Claire's words stopped dead.
She looked at Iris, who was brimming with expectation, then at Kazuma beside her, who was grinning wickedly while desperately holding in his need to pee, and finally at Kōichi, whose face seemed to say, I'm doing this for your own good.
"A-As you command, Your Highness."
Claire swallowed her frustration so hard it was practically grinding her teeth into dust. Trembling, she sheathed her rapier, each step looking as if she were walking across hot coals.
She went to the edge of the pit, grabbed Megumin by the back of her collar with obvious disgust, and hoisted the loli, who had already fully entered standby mode, onto her back.
"Ugh... your armor is so hard... it's uncomfortable..."
Megumin mumbled in her sleep.
"Shut up, you little brat! Complain again and I'll throw you into the river over there and purify you!"
Claire growled under her breath, her back radiating both humiliation and grief.
Kōichi turned around in satisfaction and gestured politely to Rain, as elegant as a royal protocol officer.
"Rain-sama, it's a long road ahead, so I'll leave our safety from here on to a professional Wizard like you. After all... friends don't need to draw such clear lines between each other, right?"
...
After a pleasant trek, Axel, the town that symbolized beginners and all kinds of strange rumors, finally appeared on the horizon.
The setting sun painted Claire's silver armor crimson. Whether that was because of the evening glow or the rage she had built up from carrying Megumin the entire way, while Megumin drooled all over her back, was hard to say.
They had only just stepped through the city gates, and before Kōichi could even suggest a grand meal at the tavern, Claire swiftly shoved Megumin, who had already woken up but was still pretending to be dead, into Kazuma's arms.
She briskly straightened her disheveled cloak, knelt on one knee before Princess Iris with a grave expression, and spoke with an urgency that allowed no refusal.
"Your Highness, the cheerful commoner experience game ends here. Now that the One-Punch Bear has been slain and your safety has been confirmed, we must return to the Royal Capital at once."
Rain also stepped forward. Although her expression was gentler than Claire's, her tone was just as firm.
"Your Highness, the palace is already in an uproar over your disappearance. If you do not show yourself soon, I fear the Lord of Axel will be put on trial. Please understand our difficulties."
Princess Iris's excited little face instantly fell. She lowered her head and looked at her muddy little boots, which served as proof of her adventure, then turned back to Kōichi with deep reluctance.
"We have to leave so soon...? But Kōichi-sama still hasn't taken me to see Axel's legendary fountain that shoots water, and he hasn't treated me to that cheap Adventurer's meal that smells of sweat..."
Claire shot Kōichi a sidelong glare, the murderous intent in her eyes strong enough to freeze the air.
"Your Highness! That fountain is full of vomit and soapy water from that blue-haired madwoman, and that meal will only ruin your stomach! Please face reality. You are a noble princess, while certain people..."
She deliberately paused, then gave a cold snort.
"Are nothing more than pebbles that happened to cross your path."
"Hey! Who are you calling a pebble?!"
Kazuma shouted indignantly from behind, but Kōichi stopped him with a single look.
Kōichi took a step forward. Under Claire's wary gaze, he maintained the perfect social distance and gave Iris a deep smile filled with adult gentleness.
"Your Highness Iris, although wonderful times are always brief, that is exactly where the romance of an Adventurer lies. No feast lasts forever, but there will always be cups raised for a reunion."
Kōichi spoke slowly, and instead of sounding offended, his tone carried an almost lofty elegance.
"You have your duties in the Royal Capital, and we have our mission here in Axel. But please rest assured. Even after you return to that distant palace, whenever you look up at the moon, you will remember that on this day, you were once as free as the wind."
"Kōichi-sama..."
Iris clutched the hem of her skirt tightly, her eyes reddening slightly.
"I-I'll definitely remember! When I grow up... no, when I have time, I'll definitely sneak... ahem, formally invite all of you to the Royal Capital as my guests!"
...
Outside Axel's city gates, the lavish royal carriage drawn by pure white steeds had already kicked up a rolling cloud of dust, gradually shrinking into a blurry speck beneath the glow of the setting sun.
Kōichi remained in his "elegant farewell" pose, his right arm still suspended in midair, with a faintly sorrowful heroic smile he had practiced countless times resting on his lips. Beside him, Kazuma stood like a soulless stone statue, his whole body taking on a grayish-white, half-transparent look.
A breeze swept up two dead leaves, sending them spinning past their feet.
"...She's gone," Kazuma said in a dry voice, his empty eyes staring as though into the abyss of nothingness. "My... my gold coins, my title, my dream life of being supported by a cute Princess and drinking premium sparkling wine with every meal without ever having to work again... it all rolled away with that carriage."
Kōichi's perfect smile stiffened as well. He slowly lowered his arm, his movements so rigid they seemed to creak like a rusted magical device.
He mechanically turned his head and stared at the empty road, his once-deep gaze now as vacant as a dead fish's.
"Yeah. She's gone."
Kōichi's voice was airy, carrying the hollow emptiness of someone who had reached enlightenment too late.
"What was I thinking just now? I was actually thinking about cups raised for a reunion? At a time like that, I should have asked her for a royal emblem, or even an IOU I could exchange for tens of millions of Eris in the Royal Capital... Did Aqua infect my highly intelligent brain at that exact moment?"
The two looked at each other and let out a long sigh at the same time, long enough to make the surrounding adventurers feel a chill down their spines.
"Hey, Kōichi."
Kazuma patted Kōichi on the shoulder, even though he looked like he was about to cry himself.
"We didn't get any gold coins, but at least... you've been put on Claire's hit list. That's kind of a status symbol too, right?"
"Shut up, Kazuma Satou."
Kōichi cut him with a sharp glare, his voice full of bleak misery.
"Without the princess as our shield, Claire is absolutely going to slice me into sashimi the next time we meet. Right now, we're nothing more than two ordinary broke guys who have to go back and face that useless Goddess who only ever asks for money to buy booze, along with a whole pile of messes."
From the tavern in the distance came Aqua's wail of despair after failing to pay the bill. The sound struck like a heavy hammer, completely shattering the last tiny remnants of their heroic dreams.
Kōichi took a deep breath of air filled with the scent of poverty, then lowered his head in defeat, as if even half his spine had been carried away by that vanishing carriage.