"Valiant Hildegard," Umbra hums in my ear. "Tell me about her."
I'm halfway through chewing on seared flank steak and I nearly choke. We're at the dining table having dinner, just the two of us, and the question catches me so off guard that my mind shuts down. Fumbling for any words to say, I stall by chewing for longer than usual as I try to piece together how I should even begin to answer that.
"Ah. Suddenly so tense." Umbra drinks some wine and offers me the goblet. "Of course, you may decline if you choose, Crimsy. I only ask because, when you pleaded for her, Radiant Fable Zip, and Fable Penelope to be spared, you said you would explain later. I was waiting for you to bring it up again, but… It has been some time since."
I gulp down the wine. It's gone too soon. "Um. Can I have more of this, please?"
"Of course." With one finger inside the goblet, she starts to pour until the wine passes her claw and touches her red scales, at which point she hands it over. "Poor timing?"
"No, no, it's… Fine timing. We don't have court until this evening, so…" I drink more, and more, and more, emptying the goblet in one go. Hells. Here goes. "Let's start with the other two first."
"Certainly. I'm listening."
I nod, exhaling the wine fumes.
"I've told you I was a racing wyvern. Most of that was in these undercloud racing leagues. We'd set up our own courses wherever we wanted and have our races late at night. They got pretty dangerous too. Tight quarters and sharp turns, around or even through Church buildings, sometimes we'd even dive down to Avi, all of it at max speeds. And since they were illegal races, some of the dracs who were in or around them were pretty rough around the dorsals."
"I can imagine." She refills the wine and has a drink before passing it back to me. "Were they ever cruel to you? For being crossblooded."
"Surprisingly, no. Nobody cared. All that mattered to anyone was how fast you were, and how high you ranked within your species class."
"Then they adored you, certainly. The fastest wyvern alive, no?"
"It was…" Scratching my head, I let out a sigh. "It was complicated. I wasn't unpopular or anything. Everyone liked me well enough, some more than others. It's just that, because I'm so small for a wyvern, they didn't really know where to put me. If I raced with the wyverns, I'd win, hands down. Same with the wyrms, lindwurms, lung dragons, flying serpents, quetzals, hydras, and dragons. It was barely a competition. But if I raced with the amphitheres, I just couldn't compete."
"Ah. That does sound complicated."
"Mhm. But, along came Zip. She's a blue and pale yellow purebred whirlwind amphithere. Once upon a time, she was an heiress of some huge wealthy family up at the top of the Heavens, but they hated that she was so committed to racing. It was all she wanted to do. So one day, she just… left. Left it all behind. Flew down to join the rest of us at the bottom. And she never looked back. Really, you'd never guess she was some nobles' daughter, pampered and tailored and silver spooned, all that. At a glance, she looks exactly like the airway patrollers, and she uses that to get away with so much shit. Hells, that Zip is a troublemaker. It's all mischief and mayhem though. Ah, she's so cool… What was I saying?"
"You were too fast for the wyverns. Along came Zip."
"Oh, right. She came up with an idea for that. Instead of purely physical races, we could use magic as an equalizer. She got a bunch of amphitheres together and we all coordinated our cruising speeds to the same pace, and I used my electromancy to match it. That way, we'd all be at the same baseline, and any pace beyond that speed was all bodily exertion. Right?"
"Yes. It's quite the solution. I like it."
"It was. In theory." I huff a weak laugh. "Far too easy to cheat. And that's what happened. Too many of the others were putting just a little extra in to gain speed. Once magic entered the picture, the rules were too easy to break. So that didn't work. But I was really happy Zip tried something. We hardly knew each other at the time, but through that process, we became friends."
"Lovely. It's pleasing to hear you had some people who accepted you."
"Yeah. It was nice. Those were the days… I had so much fun back then. But then the patrollers really started cracking down on our leagues, so things haven't been nearly the same since. Um. I should mention… Um. Zip and I… We were lovers too, for a few years. But–But that's long over at this point. We broke up. Because we're better off as friends. So that's what we are. We're just friends now. Friends who… did, in the past, have… somewhat frequent sex…"
"In the past," she repeats, terrifyingly calm. "How far in the past?"
"Um." It's good that she can't see me wince. "The last time was… Shortly after you let me go back to the Heavens."
"Ah. You were compensating for your unsatisfied lust toward me."
"H–Hells, Umbsy… Maybe so. I don't know."
"Mm." She drinks more wine. "The pleasures I bestow unto you are impossible to match. I'm hardly concerned. Do you still love her?"
"Oh. Um. In her own way. Yes. Not like I love you."
"Wonderful. And the other? Penelope, is it?"
"Yes. I call her Penny. She's this adorable little white and luminous pink mothwing dracofae, with fuzzy glowing antennae and such pretty wings. And she's incredibly smart too, but more than a little, um… Well, she's always lost in thought, so she doesn't tend to be all that aware of what's happening around her. Or what people are saying to her. Or what she's doing. Or, well, anything. Until she finds a project. Something that gets her attention. And then suddenly she's sharp as your claws, analyzing things to an absurd degree, making deductions and such, connecting dots, so on. Hahh… Penny…"
"Do you miss her?"
"Yes." I drink the rest of the wine and sigh. "Oh, she's so sweet. You'd love her too, if you two ever meet. I was working on some research for… I think it was to improve my drakes' habitat. And she works at the Archives as a librarian. I didn't actually need any help, but I saw those wings and I just had to ask for a hand with gathering books. It was like talking to a stone wall, Umbsy. I'd repeat things over and over, and she just wouldn't hear me. But… I guess I'm not exactly like other people, because that didn't upset me or anything. I figured she was just tired or having a hard day, so I was patient, and… She liked that. So, I became a project. Something worth studying. Getting to know. Learning more about. And that's how it went. We fell in love."
"A racer and a librarian… Interesting pair."
"Right? We were so different, but we got along so well. There was never any fuss with her. Things just went smoothly, and they never stopped going smoothly. It was like we were perfect for each other. But…"
"Ah. I suspect sorrow was on the horizon."
"It was. She doesn't like sex. At all."
Umbra hesitates. "How peculiar…"
"That's just the way she is. No changing that. I didn't want to anyway. But, yes, we were incompatible in that one way. You know how I am."
"Insataiably desperate, yes."
"Ah–Hey! You're calling me insatiable?"
"I never claimed that I'm not insatiably lustful."
"Hm. Fair enough." I gnash on some smoked salmon she just fed me, lost in thought for a short moment. "It was amicable. We're still friends. I do kind of love her still, but in the sense that I love who she is. It's just impossible not to love Penny. Um. But still, she likes to kiss me sometimes. And nuzzle, hug, touch. She loves when I compliment her too. We're fuzzy, is what we call it. Not together, not sexual, not really romantic, just… fuzzy."
"I like that." Umbra kisses my cheek. "I'll permit it. This body of yours belongs to me, but you may kiss and be sweet upon whoever you like. What kind of owner would I be if I don't allow my pet to have a few playmates?"
I'm struck dumb. "Play… Playmates?"
"Mmhmhm." She kisses my ear and whispers, "Yes, of course. Shall I drag Zip and Penelope down here as well? Would it make you happy if I had more pets for you to play with? Hm?"
I roll my eyes as she attempts to seduce me. "As if I'd let you do that, Umbsy."
"Ah. You're right. Perish the thought of my needing or wanting any pet besides you…"
"I meant dragging them here against their will to be kept as pets."
She says nothing, but that pointed sip of wine speaks volumes.
"Shit. That's… Right, you did that to me. Um."
"But I would never do it to your little friends, Crimsy. I assure you."
"Mhm." I pout while she keeps kissing my body, but eventually break character and snicker. "Yes, yes, hello. Hells, I think she likes me."
"I do. Mm." After slicking my neck with her black tongue, she hums. "Delicious. As always. Now then…"
"Damn, I was hoping you'd forgotten."
"If you don't wish to discuss it…"
"I think I should. You deserve to know."
"In your own time, Crimsy."
I drink more wine still, then sigh.
"I'll tell you everything. Can we go float?"
"Absolutely, my love. Right away."
I'm dreading the mere thought of doing this.
But Umbra deserves to know.