"Did you talk to him?"
"Yeah. Comrade Nine-Tails expressed a deep awareness of the importance and urgency of work, and will henceforth earnestly fulfill his responsibilities, strengthen coordination, and form a joint working force…"
"Stop. Speak human."
"Sorry. Wrote speeches for bosses too long—muscle memory. Anyway, I bluffed him, but draining his chakra will take time."
"So we still follow the script today?"
"No rush. Let's play with him first."
Konoha Village, training grounds.
Sakura and Naruto chatted away, completely ignoring Sasuke standing alone in the breeze. His eyes grew stranger by the second.
"You're that eager to play?" Sakura frowned at Naruto.
"I never even killed an ant in my past life. If I want to survive this brutal world, I need every chance to train."
"Farming XP can wait. Kakashi's a key NPC. Deviating from the plot could cause problems."
"...By the way, I've been meaning to ask—do you really love soulslike games?"
"Huh?"
"You talk in game jargon nonstop."
"...Sure."
Off to the side, Sasuke got more confused.
Soulslike? Jargon? NPC?
What are they even saying?
His pride kept him from asking. He just turned away and waited for Kakashi to arrive.
Soon, with a puff of smoke, Kakashi showed up late as always.
"Yo. Morning, everyone." He greeted lazily.
He'd expected three kids to angrily demand why he was so late.
Instead Naruto walked up and said, "As expected of the boss. Day one and you already taught us a vivid lesson."
Sakura: "What lesson?"
"Slacking off! Boss has a jōnin post and still calmly lazed half a day away. A model for us all."
Naruto even waggled his eyebrows at Kakashi, throwing Kakashi's rhythm off entirely.
"Ahem. On the way here I ran into an old lady—"
"Right, right, that one!" Naruto grinned. "Tell me which street next time. I'll go help her too."
Kakashi went speechless.
He scratched his eyebrow helplessly, then explained the rules.
"...In short, if you don't come at me with the resolve to kill, you won't take these bells."
He scanned the three.
Sasuke looked tense—finally normal.
Naruto and Sakura were forcing expressions, but no fear in their eyes.
Especially Naruto—there was clear excitement.
"Interesting kid," Kakashi thought. "Let's see what you can do."
"Alright then. Start!"
The moment he said it, Sakura and Sasuke leapt back—while Naruto did the opposite, shooting forward like an arrow.
He yanked a kunai from his pouch mid-dash and stabbed straight for Kakashi's throat. Kakashi's eyes narrowed; he caught the strike and clamped Naruto's wrist.
Naruto didn't panic. He twisted sideways and kicked for Kakashi's waist, blocked by an elbow. Naruto used that instant to flick Sakura a look.
She understood. Gathering chakra in her fist, she slammed the ground.
BOOM!
A dull shockwave rippled—then a hail of kunai burst from the nearby woods, whistling toward Kakashi.
The whole combo took under five seconds.
Naruto, still held, grinned slyly. He didn't even look at the incoming kunai—just flexed hard, trying to pin Kakashi in place.
The kunai struck, punching countless holes through them—
—or rather, through Kakashi's log substitute and Naruto's shadow clone.
Naruto's real body stepped out from behind Sakura.
He praised Kakashi with a grin. "Not bad, boss."
From the start Naruto's real body had been hidden in the forest. He'd made two clones: one bait, one sent early to Sakura so she could set the trap.
It was a rough plan he'd drafted last night.
He didn't expect a one-shot victory; he wanted to adapt to real ninja combat fast.
And the feedback was clear: his fighting skill was lacking, and his close-quarters transitions relied mostly on instinct.
Kakashi nodded slightly. "Nice try. Looks like you listened."
Then he rummaged in his pouch and shamelessly pulled out Icha Icha Paradise.
Here we go.
Naruto smirked inside.
The biggest difference between him and canon Naruto was that he knew the plot and had adult social experience—so Kakashi's provocations wouldn't work on him.
But Icha Icha Paradise itself could be Kakashi's weakness.
"Boss, is that the super-popular Icha Icha Paradise you're reading?"
Naruto strode closer.
"Hm?" Kakashi raised a brow. "Isn't that book off-limits for minors?"
"I haven't read it." Naruto shrugged. "But a few days ago I met the author—long hair to the waist, looked like a sage. He even told me what happens later."
Naruto grinned wickedly. "Kakashi-sensei… you wouldn't want me to spoil the ending, would you?"
Kakashi's dead-fish eyes finally cracked. "Wait—how did you even meet the author—"
"And the finale of Icha Icha is—"
"Stop!" Kakashi yelped, covering his ears on reflex.
Sakura, hiding in the bushes, snorted with laughter immediately.
Sasuke saw it and froze.
"Now!"
He whipped out shuriken and threw them at Kakashi.
At the same time, Sakura circled quietly behind Kakashi, waiting for an opening.
The three unknowingly completed a clean teamwork play.
Whoosh! Whoosh! The shuriken zipped in—but Kakashi ducked as if he had eyes on his back. The shuriken flew past him… toward Naruto.
"Hey, could've warned me!" Naruto shot Sasuke a look and dove aside, barely avoiding them.
And in that moment, Sakura reached for the bells at Kakashi's waist.
Hands still over his ears, Kakashi chuckled.
"Ninja tactical principle number one: taijutsu."
Naruto's scalp fizzed. "Sakura, dodge!"
His brain spun.
He did it on purpose. Absolutely on purpose.
He "sold" an opening, baited Sasuke and Sakura into exposing their positions, then countered instantly.
Just a few seconds: offense neutralized, control reclaimed.
Now Naruto truly understood Kakashi's reputation.
Even with plot knowledge, forcing a win here was impossible.
But pulling Kurama's chakra out already wasn't Naruto's intention either. He didn't want a full deathmatch with Kakashi.
So—
time to change approach.
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