As i saw them all together, 2 days ago...
I've been fretting over what my life has become.
Honestly... i'm unaware, what will happen to me in the next 10 months...
what will become of me after the contract expires?
Will my sister take care of me?
Or will i continue living the mediocre,
worthless life i have been living for the past god knows how long!
But for now... all i had to do was work like this for the next 10 months and hope that sister takes care of us and succeeds after me.
And also willingly look after me and not throw me in the trash like they did.
But, if she doesn't... i guess i'll just have to kill myself!
I have no reason to live... i'm gonna stay worthless the rest of my life.
And as long as i continue working in the sewers, no women will even look my way...
If they knew that i was working in the sewers, i'm sure they'll be disgusted beyond recognition.
And that's why... i was ashamed of myself as i walked past them.
That was why i hid my face, as i didn't want them to look at my shit soaked face.
Even now... i wonder if at some point some miracle will occur and i'm taken away from this place by a beautiful fairy.
But, i've been hoping for the same thing... even in my past life.
Than i hoped that i would be worth something, but couldn't and even now... it's the fkin same.
Women scoffled at my mere presence mocking my appearence from head to toe.
Here women, just don't notice my existance at all.
Even when i came here, i was ready to not receive any love and continue living a darn worthless life...
But, when realiy hit and it was exactly the same as i had imagined it to be, i can't help but despair at the fact that there ain't 1 person who liked me, be it for who i may be or what i might have.
In both instances i'm absolutely worthless and unreliable.
So... what can i a worthless man with no talent whatsoever do?
Devote his life to the 1 work he was given.
Like my previous life, i latched onto the 1 job i barely got and survived with it throgh thick and thin.
I had nobody by my side, i was alone in both body and mind.
Even if i liked someone, my salary was enough to make them back off.
I Hoped i were liked for who i was rather than what i had but...
i realised that the reason why i wanted to be liked for me was because i had nothing to offer except for me as a person.
I foolishly believed that humans would like another for them rather than their but... i was naive and stupid.
I thought i'd get some self satisfaction after i reject all the women who rejected me
because of what i was when they wanted me at my best but...
That in essence was my best, just a plain worthless guy who worked hard but got nothing in return for it.
My dad was the same and so was i...
We both lived meaningless lives loved by nobody.
Maybe that's why... i cling onto my personality like a rotten leech because...
everyone has rejected my personality and if i tired to change myself, i know that i'm rejecting who i am as a human.
At the end of the day, only 1 can stand with myslef and that's why...
I as a brain will stand with my soul as a personality.
Because when nobody wanted me, i was all i had.
That's why i'll never let go of my weird personality...
...
After fretting worthless monologues for a while... i finally realised it was time to leave and took my leave when...
I heard giant footsteps from somewhere.
As they rapidly moved towards me.
It was so fast that my eyes couldn't see them properly.
It was the damn monster that everyone was weirdly obsessed about.
Why... why the hell is it here? what's it doing in a place like this?
I was in panic as i saw it come at me at a rapid speed.
It grabbed me by the neck and slammed me on the ground as i became covered with gutter.
"Hehe, finally found you."
"Gah!"
He stated with a sinister voice.
Huh? What does he mean by that? was he looking for me?
Why? Why? Why?
"What did i do? why are you looking for a guy as worthless as me?"
I asked in a self depricating manner in hopes of him letting me live.
"Well kid, that's what you get for upsetting my master."
He stated, as he smirked menasingly.
"Your master? Did i offend someone?"
"Man, i don't know the details but it appears that you were extremely close with my master's women and that's why... you will die due to his twisted sense of reason."
"Why? Please, Leave me alone. I have nothing to do what what you are saying... Let me live, i have a sister to take care of pleasee!!"
He sighed in disappointment as he looked at me.
"I'm sorry kid, Rules are rules and since master stated that i had to bring your head body to him... that is what I'll do."
He stated as he slammed the guy's face.
Than repeatedly punched him in the gut, abdomin and heart.
Decisive punches continued coming towards me and at some point... i couldn't even move.
I clasped my hands together and pleased him.
"Please, Please! If... if i don't work now... if i die here my sick mother... She'll-"
Before i could even finish my sentence... he smacked me in the face.
"And why should i care about your mother? Aah... wait is she hot? If she is, than i might just-"
a pubch came at the monster's face which was dodged swiftly.
"Hmm... i didn't even notice you! Interesting!"
"Gah!"
A kick right in the gut and i started caughing repeatedly again.
Mother... why?
Sister... Why?
Why is this happening to me?
Why is there not 1 person who's willing to put me out of danger?
Why do i have to live and die meaninglessly?
Can't i just either survive meaningfully or die meaninglessly?
Why do i have to both live and die meaninglessly?
What's the point?
Why can't i do anything about my life???
The decisive blow came as a sword was stabbed right through my heart.
"Gah!"
"Well, this is goodbye!"
He stated as he smirked at me.
I was slowly losing conciousness as my legs, hands and my entire body started giving in to fatigue.
"Mom! Sis! I'm really sorry."
After some point of constant rejection... i finally decided to give in.
As i slowly lost control over me as i slowly closed my eyes.
Unable to control them any longer.