After passing through a luxurious corridor lined with thick red carpet, Kōichi and Kazuma, led by Rain, finally arrived at the palace's private reception hall.
When the gem-inlaid mahogany doors opened, a dazzling wave of jewels, gold, and the irresistibly tempting aroma of roasted meat rushed toward them.
"Kōichi-san! Kazuma-san!"
Princess Iris, dressed in a gorgeous and adorable house dress, sprang up from the sofa like a cheerful little bird. Her golden eyes shone with undisguised surprise and delight.
"You really came to visit me! I'm so happy! When Claire told me you were outside, I thought I was dreaming!"
Hearing that, Claire, who stood behind Iris, instantly turned as dark as the bottom of a pot. She clenched her teeth and dragged a murderous gaze across Kōichi's and Kazuma's necks.
However, Kōichi and Kazuma had no attention to spare for Claire's killing intent.
Their eyes had been completely glued to the supreme delicacies spread across the long dining table in the center of the reception hall: a sizzling whole roast pig, steaks drizzled with truffle sauce, and premium seafood piled up like a mountain.
"Your Highness! To see your pure and flawless smile again is the greatest honor of our lives!"
While praising her with extremely elegant words, Kōichi dashed to the dining table at lightning speed, grabbed a roast pork leg, and stuffed it into his mouth.
"Mmph, mmph... Your Highness, there wasn't a single moment in Axel when we didn't miss you!"
Kazuma refused to fall behind. He picked up a plate of lobster and poured it into his mouth, shell and all, eating like a starving ghost who had not seen food in eight hundred years.
Iris watched the two wolfing everything down. Not only was she not disgusted, she actually looked worried for them.
"You two must have gone through so many difficult battles on your journey, right? Please, eat as much as you want! Once you're finished, you must tell me all about your adventures in Axel! I really want to hear them!"
The moment they heard the words "adventures in Axel," the two men, who had been devouring food like mad, froze at the same time.
An invisible smoke of gunpowder suddenly filled the air.
Kōichi swallowed the pork in his mouth, and his gaze instantly sharpened.
He knew very well that this was the perfect chance to establish himself as the palace's number one honored freeloader.
As long as he made the princess happy, wealth and glory would be guaranteed from here on out!
Kazuma also set down the lobster shell, his eyes burning with the flames of competing for favor.
With half a roast pig between them, their gazes clashed fiercely in midair, as if sparks might fly.
Kōichi: Shut up, Kazuma. If you tell her about your pathetic stories, the princess will only think you're a pervert! Let me show her the wisdom of a strategist!
Kazuma: Cut the crap! I'm the legend of Axel! Little Sister Princess loves hearing grassroots success stories like mine!
"Ahem."
Kōichi made the first move. He elegantly wiped the corner of his mouth with a napkin and put on a deep, solemn expression.
"Your Highness, in truth, after you left, Axel faced an extremely terrifying crisis. And I, as the brains of the team, relied on extraordinary intellect to lay out a stunning chain of schemes. Not only did I resolve the crisis without spilling a single drop of blood, I also..."
"He's full of crap!"
Kazuma tore him down on the spot without mercy, pointing at Kōichi's nose and shouting.
"Your Highness, don't listen to his bragging! His so-called chain of schemes was just him hiding in the back and pushing his teammates out to die! The one who truly faced the monsters head-on, danced on the edge of life and death, and protected the town with his own flesh and blood was me! Kazuma Satou!"
"Oh? Is that so?"
Kōichi gave a cold laugh and shot back.
"Who was it that got wanted by the whole town after stealing a female Adventurer's panties?"
"You actually dare bring that up?! That only happened because my skill is too powerful!"
Kazuma, both embarrassed and angry, slammed the table and stood up.
"What about you?! Who packed his bags in the middle of the night to run away from debt, bumped into me in the living room, and then tried to pin everything on me?!"
"That was a strategic retreat! You don't know shit!"
The two went back and forth, exposing each other's dirty laundry and dragging out every shameful, bottomless disgrace they had committed in Axel.
Iris rested her chin in her hands, listening with great interest, her eyes sparkling.
"Wow! So an Adventurer's life is that thrilling and fun? Kōichi-san and Kazuma-san really are close!"
"Who's close with him?!"
The two shouted in unison, then continued glaring at each other.
Claire, standing nearby, was nearly fainting from rage. The veins on the hand gripping her sword hilt bulged as she whispered through clenched teeth to Rain.
"Listen to them! What kind of filthy nonsense are these two scumbags spouting?! Her Highness's ears are being polluted! Let me cut them down!"
"Endure it, Claire."
Rain pushed up her glasses, her tone still calm.
"As long as Her Highness is happy, even if they are two ridiculous clowns, they still have a reason to exist. However..."
A cold gleam flashed through Rain's eyes.
"I will keep a close watch on them."
The grand contest of tearing each other down to win favor finally came to an end amid Princess Iris's crisp, bell-like laughter.
Although Kōichi and Kazuma had, through each other's mouths, been reduced to cowardly, shameless social garbage with no moral bottom line, through Iris's thick "close friend" filter, all of it was automatically transformed into the deep bonds and carefree boldness shared between Adventurers.
Iris looked toward Claire, whose face had gone so dark it could drip ink, and Rain, who remained expressionless.
"Claire, Rain, please arrange the two most comfortable guest rooms for Kōichi-san and Kazuma-san. Be sure to treat my friends with the highest level of hospitality!"
"Your Highness! This is..."
Claire had just started to protest, but when she met Iris's innocent, expectant eyes, she could only force the words back down. Grinding her teeth, she bowed her head and accepted the order.
"As you command, Your Highness."
...
Half an hour later, in the VIP guest room area of the palace's east wing.
"These are your rooms."
Rain pushed open two heavy carved wooden doors, her tone as cold as if she were reading out a death sentence.
"Dinner will be delivered to you. Without permission, you are forbidden from wandering around the palace, especially anywhere near Her Highness's bedchamber. If the patrolling Knights find you acting suspiciously..."
"Got it, got it! We'll definitely behave ourselves!"
Kōichi and Kazuma had not listened to Rain's warning at all. Their souls had long since been stolen away by the lavish sight inside the rooms.
Rain gave a cold snort, turned, and left, closing the doors behind her.
The moment the doors shut, Kōichi and Kazuma rushed into their respective rooms like two wild dogs freed from their leashes.
"Holy crap! Is this mattress made of clouds?! It's so soft!"
Kazuma launched himself forward and sank deep into a huge bed large enough for five or six people. He rolled madly across the silk sheets, letting out an extremely sleazy giggle.
"Hehehe... Now this is a human life! That shabby stable in Axel was basically a pigsty! If two maids came in to scrub my back, my life would be complete!"
In the room next door, Kōichi's reaction was not much better.
He stood before the enormous full-length mirror, striking all kinds of poses he thought were handsome and profound.
"Hmph. So this is what freeloading in the Royal Capital tastes like? It really is something else."
Kōichi picked up a cluster of crystal grapes from the table and tossed one into his mouth with elegant flair, ambition flashing in his eyes.
"With this status, not only can I eat and drink the best of everything, but when I go out to fool people in the future, who would dare not show Royal VIP Kōichi Hayashi a little respect? This is a massive win!"
After enjoying themselves in their own rooms for a while, the two somehow ended up on the luxurious balcony connecting their rooms at the same time.
Night had fallen, and the lights of the Royal Capital spread out beneath them like a dazzling sea of stars.
The evening breeze drifted by, carrying the fragrance of flowers.
Kōichi held a glass of premium red wine he had taken from the room's wine cabinet. Leaning against the white marble railing, he raised his glass toward Kazuma, who had also come out holding a glass.
"Cheers, Kazuma. To successfully infiltrating the royal palace."
By now, Kōichi had completely forgotten that only a few hours earlier, the two of them had been exposing each other's dirty laundry. He had returned to his usual composed manner.
"Cheers!"
Kazuma downed the priceless red wine in one gulp as if it were cold water, then smacked his lips.
"Kōichi, wouldn't it be great if we could live here forever? No fighting disgusting frogs, no listening to Aqua complain. Just eating and drinking every day..."
"Don't worry."
Kōichi smiled confidently.
"As long as we cling tightly to Princess Iris and keep her happy, this palace will be our retirement home. As for that violent woman Claire, as long as we behave ourselves in front of the princess, all she can do is glare."
The two exchanged a smile, their expressions filled with boundless longing for the beautiful freeloading life ahead, as well as the tacit understanding of two scoundrels working hand in glove.
However, they had no idea that in the garden directly below their rooms, a pair of eyes filled with murderous intent was staring fixedly at the two of them on the balcony.
Claire gripped the hilt of her sword, her nails digging deep into her palm.
"Laugh while you can, you two scumbags... I will definitely catch you doing something wrong, and then I'll personally send you both to the guillotine!"