The house was empty but I don't want to leave, the furniture is not there, I stand at the door of our room and see where the bed was and I see us there, lying down, I go out and see us having breakfast at our table, organizing the housework that you didn't like to do. Giro, and we are in the kitchen cooking together, having a drink, talking and laughing as if nothing mattered. I turn again and now we are in the armchair, covered, hugging each other, as if we only depended on being like this, I see us running around the house, playing, fighting.
I see us pass like in that kind of fast camera, every moment, every discussion, every hug, every kiss, and now there is nothing, the house is empty and silent. I don't understand how we got to this point, you're not here, our home was disarmed and I couldn't save us. I hate myself because I couldn't do anything, I didn't know what to do to avoid reaching this moment or event rather. The last nights were horrible, nights full of doubts in my head, my thoughts never stop, I didn't want to fall asleep because I knew I was going to dream about you and waking up would be more difficult to notice reality.
I need you, I call you and your cell phone line doesn't give me, the messages don't reach you, where are you? I can't sleep with the light off because it scares me, because in the middle of the darkness those thoughts appear, I start to overthink everything, and you're not there to hug me and give me peace of mind like you always did.
Empty, broken, without emotions, and afraid of everything, that's how I've been lately since I saw our home without everything we put together, I can't forget everything, it's all engraved in my head and it hurts, it hurts a lot. It hurts to know that you are no longer here, that we stop being one, and lose everything.