Honestly, if I could go back in time, I'd smack myself on the head before I ever opened my mouth.
Sighing inwardly, I decided to pull out that card.
The propaganda that the War Ministry was so fond of spreading.
If nothing else, it sounded noble enough to fool anyone.
For authenticity, I adjusted my posture, deepened my voice.
Here we go.
"It's not like that, Selena."
Not a bad start. My unusually deep voice surprises her.
Her eyebrows lift a little, and she leans back slightly as if hearing me for the first time.
My senior soldiers used to say my normal voice was too high and sounded strange.
They suggested I deliberately lower it. Well, looks like they were right.
Sometimes you learn the strangest things in the military.
"I just wanted to fulfill my duty to the Empire as a nobleman. And if I was going to serve, I wanted to do it as a regular soldier, not an officer, to see things from the bottom up."
"...Really?"
Her voice trembles, unsure, as if she can't tell whether to believe me or not.
"Really. As if any sane person would enlist as a regular soldier just because they got rejected."
Yes. That crazy person is right here!
Dead center, sitting across from you, desperately holding his dignity together with duct tape.
"Well, if that's really... the case... that's a relief... It's really true, right? That was really the reason?"
"It's true, I tell you. It's not your fault at all, so don't worry. If you keep acting like this, it makes my years of sacrifice for the Empire seem like they were for some strange reason."
Please. Please don't see me as a pathetic fool who enlisted as a regular soldier because I was rejected.
One person looking at me with pity is enough. Please! Please!!
After my tearful persuasion, Selena seems to be calming down.
Her shoulders relax, her gaze softens, and the tension in her expression melts away.
If she heard that the man she rejected was so hurt that he, a nobleman, did something as crazy as enlisting as a regular soldier…
And if her response was, "Oh, I see. What an idiot." That wouldn't make her the female lead, would it?
No, that would make her someone unforgivable.
That's something only a villain or a tyrannical empress would do, right?
And thankfully, she is neither.
For now.
----
Our reunion wasn't terrible... thankfully.
Honestly, that alone feels like a miracle.
It's fortunate. Imagine if Selena had said, "Sorry, there's still no place for you in my heart" right when we met.
If she had dropped something like that on me the moment we reunited, I probably would have taken another leave of absence, unable to overcome the trauma of my past actions.
Just imagining it makes my stomach twist.
"Anyway, welcome back, Leon. Oh, I guess you're my junior now?"
"Yes, yes. Just a freshman chick. Senior Selena. Good luck with your final year."
I even salute jokingly, trying to hide the awkwardness rooting itself in my chest.
"...You really seem so different from back then."
"I must be. I deeply contemplated the meaning of life in the military."
Selena bursts into laughter.
Genuine, bright, unrestrained—like she couldn't help it.
My answer must have struck a chord with her as complete nonsense.
I understand. Even I think it's ridiculous.
Contemplating life in the military? That guy must have had it easy.
Where would you find time to contemplate life in the military? You're just constantly grinding.
Usually working your ass off on duties.
When training comes, you're exhausted.
Then when war breaks out, you're fighting for your life, thinking about suicide.
Before you know it, there's no time for life contemplation—each day just passes by.
Day after day blurs into a mess of soaked uniforms, cold meals, and the smell of sweat and gunpowder.
So yeah. Contemplating life?
What a joke.
"S-sorry. You sound just like my brother."
"Your brother must have had some tough experiences too."
"He said he did. Oh, I have a lecture now. See you later."
Why "see you later"? Can't we just stop meeting?
I'm too uncomfortable. More precisely, remembering the past is killing me...!
Well, at least my past self had good taste.
Meeting her face-to-face, Selena was definitely Selena.
There's a reason she's the female lead.
There's a reason more than ten guys confessed to her.
She really is beautiful. If I didn't know her, I might have blushed and that would be it.
That kind of gentle charm, paired with the elegance she carries naturally—yeah, it's obvious why everyone falls for her.
Of course, to me now, she's just an uncomfortable classmate, nothing more, nothing less.
No fluttering heart, no romantic tension—just the cold sweat of traumatic memory.
Gulp—
After finishing my coffee, I was about to leave the café.
The quiet hum of students chatting around me does nothing to calm my nerves.
Having just returned to school, I still don't know my way around.
Everything feels both familiar and unfamiliar at the same time.
I should explore a bit to avoid getting lost in the Academy later—
Better to wander now than embarrass myself during class transitions.
"Ugh."
Suddenly, my body is jerked backward and dragged away before I can even see what's happening.
My feet scrape the floor, and my heart leaps to my throat.
What's going on? A kidnapping? Right in the middle of the Academy?!
Who would even dare to pull something like this?
Are they spies trying to extract Empire military secrets? Please spare me! I'll tell you everything!
I'll confess! I'll talk! I'll even reveal who ate the emergency rations during night patrol!
"I brought him."
"You were just talking with Selena?"
"That's what I'm saying. I saw it myself."
"...To think he was the first one. My goodness."
Voices come from all directions.
Low murmurs, surprised whispers—every single one of them aimed at me.
One annoying thing is that they're all men.
And even more annoying—they're talking like I'm some sort of fallen legend.
After a moment, when I could move freely and look around...
"...Well, well."
I immediately recognized who had brought me here.
Even without introductions, there was no mistaking them.
From the right: Schlieffen, Wilhelm, Alexander, and Joachim.
The glorious quartet of male leads. And all of them had been rejected by Selena.
Oh, right. How do I know their names and faces when I don't know my other classmates?
There's a way to tell. They're annoyingly handsome, even to another man.
Ridiculously tall, perfectly styled hair, sharp jawlines—the whole infuriating package.
And when not two or three, but four such guys move around in a group?
That's almost certainly the male lead quartet.
A walking, glittering bundle of protagonist energy.
"What do you guys want?"
But even if they are the male lead quartet, I was the first one to be rejected.
You four kings are still far from breaking my record... No, wait, damn it.
That's not something to be proud of.
And yet, here I am—Leon, the original rejector-turned-record-holder—
standing before four handsome protagonists who all followed my tragic footsteps.
What a legendary achievement.
If only I could bury myself somewhere right now.